Two nights ago..
10 pm - I was with a friend, her name is Ecca. a strange feeling was starting to give me freeze on my skin before we decided to have our dinner at MCDO Timog. But i was thinking twice to visit my fave cake cafe' along Tomas Morato.
10:45pm- We're riding on a jeep along Tomas Morato. I told Ecca to stop over Kitchen of Cakes coz i was craving for a single mouth-watering Decadent cake. "Manong, sa tabi lang"..
Ecca was walking fast and heading her way to Kitchen. Suddenly, i noticed him wearing a purple shirt in the cafe' next to Kitchen.
*He had not been texting me for almost 3 weeks. We're not seeing each other for 3 weeks coz he told me he had lot of work loads. He had all the reasons just to convince me the impossibility of seeing him.
But suddenly i noticed him wearing a purple shirt in the cafe next to Kitchen. My world stumbled down when i also noticed the girl next to him. He's with another girl.
I tried to hide myself at the back of a car. Ecca noticed i wasn't following her. so she searched for me. When she saw me, i just said, "Nasa loob siya.. si ___".. I was breaking down but i made up my mind. "Magpapakita ako sa kanya.."
11:10pm I opened the door of the cafe'. The two were sitting close to each other but i didn't give a glance. I went straight ahead the counter asking what's the specialty or best seller of the cafe'. I bought a tea and sat on the table next to them.
"May wi-fi dito.. Dito ka na lang mag-net.", i gave Ecca a blank stare telling her through my eyes, "kaya ko 'to, believe me."
So she opened her laptop. i could see in my peripheral view how they talked to each other. I knew then they noticed me.. Hello, makikita nila talaga ako kasi nasa bukana sila ng cafe'. Nawala ang sweetness nila sa isa't-isa pagkakita sa akin.. "Malandi ka", pointing to the girl but i couldn't say it loud. I was just smiling all throughout while pretending ok. One minute had passed but i felt it took so slow for the hand of clock to make another minute..
11:34pm I felt something was dying inside helplessly. something was crying inside me, " Tama na.. ang sakit-sakit na." My heart was breaking with every smile he projected.. and i knew, he was just watching me getting hurt.
I held my cellphone so tight, composing a text message.. "P_.. Harapan ito. Nagtiwala ako sau. Tapos may iba ka. Salamat ha. :)" i sent it to his number. Surely, he received and read it.
After few minutes, they went out the cafe'. I supposed they would go somewhere else. or he would bring the hypocrite in his apartment and make out. or whatever, i ran out of ideas.
The moment they closed the door, i whispered to Ecca, "Pede na bang tumulo? Kanina ko pa pinipigilan.." The warm tears fell down my cheeks and started to cry. The girls at the counter were alarmed. I didn't give a damn. I wanted to throw something away from me and get that something inside me out. "Bakit, ano ba nagawa ko sa kanya?!", cursing him, the hypocrite and myself.
I wanted to drink the shampoo, the conditioner, or the newly bought fragrance oil in my bathroom. "How stupid!". blaming myself. kelangan ko pa talaga makita ng harapan para maniwala ako na niloloko niya ako. Ang pinakamasakit, sa harap ko pa..
He denied me.. he didn't even bother to smile at me and say, "Hi, si ___, friend ko." or even a simple stare at me telling me sorry for what he had done.
I gave all the sheer madness in seeing and staying beside him but i think i will never ever gonna be enough for him.
I would never be worthy of his love,
only a hypocrite could do such..
10 pm - I was with a friend, her name is Ecca. a strange feeling was starting to give me freeze on my skin before we decided to have our dinner at MCDO Timog. But i was thinking twice to visit my fave cake cafe' along Tomas Morato.
10:45pm- We're riding on a jeep along Tomas Morato. I told Ecca to stop over Kitchen of Cakes coz i was craving for a single mouth-watering Decadent cake. "Manong, sa tabi lang"..
Ecca was walking fast and heading her way to Kitchen. Suddenly, i noticed him wearing a purple shirt in the cafe' next to Kitchen.
*He had not been texting me for almost 3 weeks. We're not seeing each other for 3 weeks coz he told me he had lot of work loads. He had all the reasons just to convince me the impossibility of seeing him.
But suddenly i noticed him wearing a purple shirt in the cafe next to Kitchen. My world stumbled down when i also noticed the girl next to him. He's with another girl.
I tried to hide myself at the back of a car. Ecca noticed i wasn't following her. so she searched for me. When she saw me, i just said, "Nasa loob siya.. si ___".. I was breaking down but i made up my mind. "Magpapakita ako sa kanya.."
11:10pm I opened the door of the cafe'. The two were sitting close to each other but i didn't give a glance. I went straight ahead the counter asking what's the specialty or best seller of the cafe'. I bought a tea and sat on the table next to them.
"May wi-fi dito.. Dito ka na lang mag-net.", i gave Ecca a blank stare telling her through my eyes, "kaya ko 'to, believe me."
So she opened her laptop. i could see in my peripheral view how they talked to each other. I knew then they noticed me.. Hello, makikita nila talaga ako kasi nasa bukana sila ng cafe'. Nawala ang sweetness nila sa isa't-isa pagkakita sa akin.. "Malandi ka", pointing to the girl but i couldn't say it loud. I was just smiling all throughout while pretending ok. One minute had passed but i felt it took so slow for the hand of clock to make another minute..
11:34pm I felt something was dying inside helplessly. something was crying inside me, " Tama na.. ang sakit-sakit na." My heart was breaking with every smile he projected.. and i knew, he was just watching me getting hurt.
I held my cellphone so tight, composing a text message.. "P_.. Harapan ito. Nagtiwala ako sau. Tapos may iba ka. Salamat ha. :)" i sent it to his number. Surely, he received and read it.
After few minutes, they went out the cafe'. I supposed they would go somewhere else. or he would bring the hypocrite in his apartment and make out. or whatever, i ran out of ideas.
The moment they closed the door, i whispered to Ecca, "Pede na bang tumulo? Kanina ko pa pinipigilan.." The warm tears fell down my cheeks and started to cry. The girls at the counter were alarmed. I didn't give a damn. I wanted to throw something away from me and get that something inside me out. "Bakit, ano ba nagawa ko sa kanya?!", cursing him, the hypocrite and myself.
I wanted to drink the shampoo, the conditioner, or the newly bought fragrance oil in my bathroom. "How stupid!". blaming myself. kelangan ko pa talaga makita ng harapan para maniwala ako na niloloko niya ako. Ang pinakamasakit, sa harap ko pa..
He denied me.. he didn't even bother to smile at me and say, "Hi, si ___, friend ko." or even a simple stare at me telling me sorry for what he had done.
I gave all the sheer madness in seeing and staying beside him but i think i will never ever gonna be enough for him.
I would never be worthy of his love,
only a hypocrite could do such..
